If
you have a skeleton in your closet, take
it out and dance with it.
--Carolyn
MacKenzie
(Please
read
this before starting your journal.)
Adapted from
Dorothy Lambert in Writing to Be Read,
Ken Macrorie
A journal is a
record kept for one’s self. As such, it is fragmentary, elusive,
disjointed, uneven in quality. Nor should
it be polished and unified. Then it would be a collection of
essays. What matters is the one entry in ten that sparkles, ready
to be set in the ring of an essay or story or poem or letter . . . .
Not only is it a
record for oneself, but of oneself. Every
memorable journal, any successful journal, is honest. Nothing
sham, phoney, false. Who is there to kid? Yet euphemism,
the word which hides the fact, is so much a part of the world; to break
through the euphemistic mold of thought to honesty is very
difficult. A journal need not be confession, or a psychoanalyst’s
couch, however. Honesty lies in observing undeceived what lies
about, not necessarily what lies within.
Finally, a
journal is a place to fail. That is, a place to try,
experiment, test one’s wings. For the moment, judgment,
criticism, evaluation are suspended; what matters is the attempt, not
the success of the attempt. In a journal, one practices the lines
before going on stage.
A journal may be
all gems, or all logs, or all plans and blueprints, or
all test tubes, or all confessions, or all collections of
oddments--what follows are some ways of seeing, of thinking of a
journal, and some suggestions of what to do with it. You may
follow one suggestion consistently, or try all, or none. At least
you will become aware of what is possible.
Think of your journal as a treasury, a jewelry box for gems
and
gold nuggets, or quotes, pithy ideas, epigrams, turns of phrases,
insights, analogies, puns, aphorisms, nutshell wisdom. You will
write little, but think much.
Think of your journal as a
storehouse into which you pack canned goods (others’ ideas), fresh
fruit, nuts, corn, string, straw, K-rations--almost anything useful, in
preparation for a rainy day, when you can browse through your
storehouse with delight and constant amazement at what is there.
Like a pack rat, don’t stop to be discriminatory in your salvaging and
collecting.
Think of your journal as a
snapshot album and you a roving reporter clicking a shutter on
life. Light and dark contrasts, color, textures, angles and
circles, portraits, landscapes: what will you photograph? .
. . See life through a lens, telescopic, microscopic, or wide-angle,
but a lens. In focus. Focus.
Think of your journal as a laboratory for experiments, blank
pages waiting to be tried. Dissect. See what the insides
are like, how it runs, how it’s put together. Examine
minutely: see with a microscope. Mix test tubes, weight,
trace patterns, fix laws. Ask questions and set about to find
answers.
Think of your journal as a
giant
wardrobe which you can step into and try on marvelous clothes.
Put on others’ styles, look in the mirror, see and feel how they
fit. Wear what you like, change with the seasons: try on 49
hats and buy none. Be Parisian, Ethiopian, or Hindi: experiment,
experiment.
Think of your journal as a
drafting board. Blank pages will become blueprints, plans for a
house to live in. Or are you drafting just window sills or a
whole cathedral? Accuracy, careful detail, sharp lines, no
smudges on the pages. If you are an idea-person, what will you
build? Watch your idea-house grow as you add bedrooms for the
birth of new thoughts.
Think of your journal as a psychoanalyst’s couch, a
confession. Lie down and talk, talk, talk. Ramble on about
irrelevancies, or else list in order your sins. Repeat, go over
and over as you peel away each layer of onionskin to the core.
Explore your depths. Dreams, Fantasies, Truths.
Think of your journal as a
tape
recorder attached directly to your brain. Record your
stream-of-consciousness, your associational dashes, dots, skip lines
and spaces for “punctuation.” Replay. Can you find
coherence in your thoughts? Emphasize and clarify such
associational leaps.
Think of your journal as
an
unmailed letter to a specific real person.
Think of your journal as a letter to yourself. What
would
you have yourself know? Or remember ten years from now?
Which self of your many selves will you choose to write to? Or
yourself as you were, say, at ten? Or yourself as you will
be? Will your other self/selves answer back? Turn your
journal into a dialogue with yourself. Argue, debate, reconcile.
Think of your journal as a
history-memoir and you as a VIP: the average citizen. Write
for an extraterrestrial citizen, or a terrestrial citizen of the 22nd
Century. Let them know how we really lived and thought. Or
else record the current world events, as filtered through your eyes,
your consciousness, your concerns. Record how history touches you.
Think of your journal as a
travelogue, even though you may travel only through tunnels from dorm
to class, like an underground person. See afresh, as if you were
born yesterday, or recently distilled from another planet. Record
the quaint customs, folkways, lore, speech patterns, superstitions,
magic, and miraculous sights of the local terrain. Chart the
unknown; fill in the map of your world.
Think of your journal as a religious exercise, one which
might
lead to a religious experience or insight. Search for new
metaphors for the wordless, the inexpressible. Reach out into the
void, reach down, reach up, to find ways of telling others what you
believe.
When I'm
writing, I know I'm doing the thing I was born to do.